Update - February 18, 2010

Well, Tuesday brought no answers, in spite of expectations. The CT scan results were not available and although my oncologist had the images on her laptop, she didn't feel that she could interpret them accurately. So - I went ahead with the chemo treatment (#3) scheduled that day. We waited in her office for an hour while she waited for radiology to send the images but there was no 'reading' to go with them. Next scheduled visit is March 8, with chemo on March 9. If information on the CT scan comes through, she will send it to me but it looks like any decision will be made now March 8 about whether or not to continue this treatment, based on its effectiveness. This was especially disappointing,as my daughter had taken a day off work to accompany us. However, we were glad of her company, regardless.

Please pray for me that I will have courage to deal with the information that comes from the CT scan and the wisdom to make good decisions about future treatment that will be based on that. I met a charming and stylish lady in the chemo department while I was being 'dosed' who told me she had been on chemo more or less for 3 years and had not had any hair for all of that time...gives one perspective but also a vision of other possibilities, which can be unnerving.

I have to keep remembering that we are given the gift of today and that it is ours to use and enjoy. Tomorrow is not guaranteed to anyone. Today it is sunny, my head cold seems to be letting up, my children are all hanging in there with their various challenges and still have time to check up on me, my husband's eyesight is improving all the while, my sister has passed the first anniversary of her terrible fall and is renovating her kitchen - lots of things to be thankful for! It's a choice, so often and I am following a friend's advice to "Choose joy!" It's much easier to live with.

Hope your day goes well and that you find your own joy in it.