Update Nov. 27, 2008

Happy Thanksgiving to any south-of-the-border readers today! I hope you have a great time with family and friends, in spite of the economic shakings we are all experiencing.

This week on the new chemo has followed much of the pattern of the first type. As long as I am on my supplementary meds after the treatment, I feel OK but when they stop, then I have a reaction to that and then I am OK again. So, Friday, Saturday and most of Sunday I was able to do the things I normally do - shopping for groceries, garbage to the dump, make it to Sunday School, go out for coffee, etc. Sunday afternoon things start to slide and Monday wasn't very good - actually spent the day in my jammies, which is rare. However, by Monday afternoon, things started to improve, and Tuesday was better - went out for supper and had a good visit with a long-time friend. Yesterday I went to get my wig re-styled and several other errands. I missed my afternoon rest and that wasn't a good idea. I'll have to make sure I get it today - or plan to be in bed by 8:00 p.m. like I was last night !

I have noticed that this type of chemo doesn't make my nose run like a tap but I do seem to be more tired and my fingers feel like I have extra skin on them. I will definitely have to put them in that ice water again at the next treatment. I don't want to lose feeling permanently.

So - just truckin' along, doing what I can, starting to think about Christmas and getting the house ready for that. Thank you again for your prayers.

How Thursday went (Nov. 20, 2008)

Just a quick update here to tell you that the day went very well, as far as any reaction to the new type of chemo. It can produce an allergic reaction and I was a little concerned - but they give Benydryl through the IV before the chemo as well as the steroid to help control that. I have had no reaction at all to this point and feel just my normal self. I have 3 days of supplementary meds - antinausea, etc. - so we'll see what happens when they are finished. I was warned about aching joints 36 hours after the chemo that should last for another 36 hrs. as well as tingling on palms of hands and soles of feet, because this type attacks nerves and can cause permanent damage. I sat for a while with both hands in cups of ice water to reduce circulation in my fingers during the chemo admin., so that not as much of it would get to my fingertips. Kind of hard to read and turn the pages...but I just alternated hands eventually.

The day itself was long, though. We were up by 6:00 and left the house by 6:40, arriving in Windsor before 8:00 - I was actually in the lab by then. Got blood drawn, was one of the first ones in to see the doctor - and then found out that my MUGA scan (heart video) had not been sent from the Chatham hospital. Had to wait at least 30 min. for that, sitting in the doctor's examining room . Nice visit with the doctor when that arrived - we are all pleased with how well I am doing - talked about my CT scan and the fact that it is clear - no spread of cancer to any internal organs! Good news ! (I had heard this before but had not had a chance to discuss it with my own doctor.) On the way from Doctor's office to chemo waiting room, I barely had time to go to the washroom before they were calling me in for chemo - looking good, timewise ! However, when they were setting me up, we ran into a big problem. My port wouldn't run cleanly to their satisfaction. It is always flushed out with saline and then they withdraw a little blood, to make sure it is open and that the chemicals will flow in properly from the chemo. You can have some serious problems if there are any leaks. Anyhow - they couldn't get any blood to come out due to a protein buildup or something, and it took them from 10:00 - 11:45 and several different procedures to finally get it open - plus some fervent prayers on my part ! Chemo didn't get started until 12:00 and I'm thinking I'm going to be there til 7:00 or so - 6 hrs. for the first chemo plus 30 min. for the clinical trial drug plus flushing the line every time they have to change IV bags. But a little 'magic' was performed somewhere along the line - helped by me not having any bad reaction to the chemo I think - vitals were checked every 15 min. for the first hour or so - and I walked out at 4:45 ! We stopped for dinner on the way home and were back in town about 7:00 p.m. Long day but it could have been longer !

So - went well - everything's cool - we'll see what the weekend brings. Thanks for your prayers.

Update - Nov.19, 2008

I've had a wonderful second week of this cycle - have felt like a normal, healthy person and have lived my life like that. Thanks be to God !

Friday: Went out for lunch as planned (terrific time), came home for my nap and then got supper ready for the incoming - son from Texas, daughter form Kitchener, husband from Toronto (homemade lasagna, a family tradition ).

Saturday: Shopping with son and daughter in the afternoon, second son and girlfriend arrive in snowstorm - it's only November ! - with new TV for us; joint present to get us into the 21st C. Later, we all go out for supper and have a great meal and a good visit. We're all about good food!

Sunday: Late breakfast because everyone is leaving later; attend CKSS high school gym rededication to honour a retiring teacher and all kids have a good visit with former teachers they haven't seen for 10 years or more. It was so good to have our kids home for the weekend; their energy and love fill the house. I appreciate their care and just their presence - they've become pretty interesting people and they're just fun to have around. They all went home in a snowstorm again but arrived safely at their home ports.

Monday: General housework - still working on that garage ! Also get out for lunch - again - this time with my dear husband!

Tuesday: Snow and cold weather have finally killed off the last of the flowers in the beds closest to the house; I can now rip out all the remnants without feeling like I have been personally responsible for their end. And - I get invited out for lunch with my husband again ! I'm on a roll !

Wednesday: Over to our GP's office before 9:00 for a flu shot and general errands after that - including breakfast out - just to make a change. By suppertime, there is a car parked in the garage !! Success at last!! Thanks to those who offered to help but it was too grungy and fiddly - had to do it on our own.

Tomorrow/Thursday: Start the second kind of chemo - have to be IN WINDSOR for 8:00 a.m. Because it is the first delivery of this kind, it will be 6 hours, followed by 30 min. of the clinical trial drug. I usually don't get started the chemo part of the day until about 10:30 - 11:00, so it's going to be a long day. However, it will get shortened each time I have it after tomorrow, if it follows the previous patterns. I have learned how to live with the first kind of chemo; not sure what will change now with the second. Time will tell.

So, you see, I had a great week. I feel normal, I look normal (except for the hair - and if I'm wearing my wig, you might not even notice that) and I can live my normal life. (I was going to say I act normal, but that would leave me open to many spurious comments, so I will leave that out!) I need to rest in the afternoon for about an hour but that's it. I am so thankful; I feel so blessed. I think it is largely the result of all the prayers that are constantly being offered up for me and I thank each of you who are taking the time to do that. This may all change tomorrow with the new chemo, but I will know that recovery and return are possible and that will help me deal with whatever tomorrow brings.

Cycle # 4 - Halfway - Nov. 13, 2008

Wednesday dawned a better day and today has been really good. Things settled down for me and I have been feeling much better than on Monday and Tuesday. I guess I just have to accept the fact that there are going to be a couple of bad/unpleasant days regardless of what steps I take to avoid them. But I'll try again next cycle and see what I can do to avoid as much as possible!

Today I was able to go shopping at several locations and go out for lunch with teaching friends I haven't seen for a while. I went out for lunch on Wednesday also but I was moving much more slowly; I get sore on the bottoms of my feet and the palms of my hands as a result of one of the chemo meds. I also had a great visit on Wednesday afternoon with dear friends whom I have known for over 40 years (how can that be ?), who live some distance away but who were passing through on their way to Windsor. So good to be able to have time with all these people who have been part of my life for a long time; it is a different kind of medicine. And guess what ? I'm going out for lunch tomorrow, too ! More time with good friends and good food ! And even better, my son is coming from Texas for the weekend and the two kids who live in Kitchener-Waterloo will come as well, so I will see three out of four of them, plus a lovely girlfriend from K-W, on the weekend. What wonderful medicine that will be !!

So, back on keel and doing OK. Thanks again for your prayers on my behalf. I am always conscious of their uplifting strength.

Cycle # 4 continues...Nov. 11, 2008

Well, I was doing really well up to Sunday - went to Sunday School and Church services and out for lunch afterwards...felt good and had a good day. Monday, not so much. I aggravated a 'pre-existing condition', due to one of the anti-nausea meds I am on, and spent most of the day horizontal. Today is not a lot better and there is a list of things I had planned to do that will not happen today either. Just have to listen to my body and not push it beyond what it can handle...and try not to expire from boredom in the process ! Have even returned to watching T.V. in desparation some days - just need a time-filler that doesn't require too much effort. I've read all the books I have on hand, for those of you who know what a reader I am - you can only read them so many times. I have learned to order through Amazon but there are limits for that, too - there are stacks of books all around my bedroom as it is. (We have a good library in town, but you have to get there, and look around, and decide on books, etc. More effort than I can manage right now.)

So - just feeling sorry for myself today - you see that I am not always 'up' ! It will pass, as it has done before, and this is the last time that I have to deal with the effects of these first two drugs. We'll see what the next kind brings - I hear it's not as nauseating and that might help me with this other issue, too. Poor bodies! What we do to them !! And they still keep going, healing themselves as they go.

Thanks again for your prayers.

Cycle # 4 starts - Nov. 7, 2008

Well, yesterday turned out just fine, after all my fussing. I called Windsor and got permission to get an extra blood test done here in Chatham on Wednesday, hoping to avoid a trip on Thursday just to find out that my white blood cells were too low for a treatment. I called Windsor Wednesday afternoon to see how things had turned out - "A nurse will call you." No call came in Wednesday, and fortunately my appointment on Thursday was at 12:30, not the usual 8:00 a.m. So I called again at 8:30 Thursday - same message. We were planning to leave by 10:00 to do some other errands on the way, and when I hadn't heard anything by 9:30, I called the pharmacy and requested my usual meds for a treament day and decided I was going, regardless! Nobody had told me not to ! Also ran around getting things cleared and cleaned for my cleaning lady, who was coming that morning...which is why I missed the little blinking light on the answering machine.

We drove to Windsor and I followed ordinary procedure - start at the lab and have more blood drawn - getting pretty good at that by now! Then upstairs for the doctor's appointment and approval for chemo. Had to wait for the lab results, which were great ! My white blood counts were right back up to normal range ! Apparently, that Neulasta shot that I am also on works more in the second week than the first and was responsible for my rebound. Live and learn. So, after that it was just normal procedure all the way. I had a very interesting chat with the nurse who was delivering my first type of chemo - it has to be injected into the port line from 3 big syringes and takes 30 - 45 min. She had just returned from her 5th Ironman competition - 2.5 mi. swim, bike ride equal to Windsor - London and then a full 26 mi. marathon run. She has children in university, so I'd say she was in her 40's. I was IMPRESSED! Life is full of interesting people.

We left Windsor about 5:30 and drove home. I took David out for supper to thank him for all his faithful driving and support for me. He's been there for me for all of this - I haven't had to do any of it alone. Doctor's visits, surgery, driving back and forth to Windsor, listening to me fuss and fret, reminding me of various doctor comments, waiting patiently out in the waiting room for hours while I have treatments, so many things. One dinner certainly doesn't cover it all, but it also meant neither of us had to cook ! We ended the day thankful for all that had turned out well.

When we got back to the house, I checked for phone messages...and got a message that had come in at 9:31 in the morning (while I was renewing my meds) telling me that everything was fine and that I should come in for my treatment !

Rain was forecast for today but I am sitting here looking out the window at blue sky and white clouds, so I don't know...still a few things to do outside. We are also embarked on the project of clearing out the garage enough to get in one car for the winter...not bad for a 2-car garage ! We are getting close and have thrown out a lot of junk, which will please our children, but there is more to do there, too, plus a lasagna to make today. So - will see what I can accomplish today while those steroids are doing their thing.

Hope your day goes well and that you are blessed in some way today.

Just Carrying On...Nov. 4/08

These are my 'good days' and I'm just enjoying them...and trying not to overdo it so that my white blood cell count can recover. We went for groceries Saturday afternoon and went out for supper that night with 'the cousins'. (David has a large group of cousins on his mother's side in the area and some of them try to get together every 6 - 8 weeks or so). Sunday, I made it to church in the morning and then in the afternoon made an apple pie, something I haven't done in a couple of years. I just had a taste for one - and there was enough pastry left over to make a blueberry pie for someone else. Desserts for the week!! Didn't do much yesterday - just a bit of junk removal...throwing out some magazines from 2000 ! Why do we think we will ever re-use some of this stuff ??

So - just putzing along, hoping my white blood cells are doing good things and that when I get to Windsor on Thursday, I will be able to have my next treatment. I am concerned that if my WBC is too low, the treatment will be delayed...and I still have this nose-blowing thing going on. Is it a cold or is it sinus irritation from the chemo? This coming treatment will be the last one of the first type and then on Nov. 20 I switch to the second kind of chemo. The first delivery of that will take 6 hours - it tends to produce allergic reactions and it is delivered slowly the first couple of times. Then still 30 min. for the clinical trial drug after that...but I will move into the room with the beds for this, so it shouldn't be too bad and I can nap if I need to.

My children all think I look good sans hair, but I tell them "Enjoy it while you can !" We have all become Skype converts in the last couple of weeks, so they have all seen me 'au naturel' and are quite complimentary in their relief. It's a scary thought, to see your mother bald. But not as scary as imagined and actually not too bad ! Interestingly enough, my hair seems to be growing back in a bit. We'll see what the second kind of chemo does; still have eyebrows and eyelashes, too.

My thought for the week has been a verse from the Old Testament, from the story of Job chapter 23, verse 10 - "God knows every detail of what is happening to me, and when He has tested me, I will be purified, like gold in a fire." The creative process is ongoing in our lives, making us into the people that God intended us to be.